I Love You Most When (Tris and Tobias)
by imfallingforyoureyes102
Summary: He loves her most in the morning, when the sun is streaming past the peak in the curtains and her head is a mess of tangles and curls. It's then, when the day still hasn't set in, that he sees her stripped of everything and anything – then when the walls that she puts up for the rest of the world are battered and shattered and pummeled into the ground.


**Sup friends, guess who's** _ **g?!**_ **It's times like now when I really do hate myself. Love you all, especially those of you who continue to stick around and cheer on my unreliable self. You guys don't know how much light you bring to my life, especially when I don't really know what's exactly going on. I know I don't thank you enough and that there is no way to truly thank you enough.**

 **I'm also thinking about starting a drabble/collection of oneshots (still continuing with MLS an TIAAB, but I'm having a bit of writer's block). Should I stick with Divergent for those oneshots, or branch out into something else – Arrow's Olicity or Spongebob and Squidward, or me and my unfinished homework… let me know!**

 **As always, love, love, love you! Please review, lights of my life, me love love love words :))).**

 **(Also, I posted this as it's own one-shot, but I also wanted to put it in here, even though the plots/timelines don't add up).**

 **Disclaimer: I don't even have the money to own a pair of socks, so yuh.**

Tobias doesn't know when he falls in love with Tris.

If anyone asks him, it's always a matter of furrowed eyebrows and tilted heads that meet their inquisition. He can't ever answer honestly, and sometimes it pains him – keeps him up until the darkest hours of the night because _how can I not know when I fell in love with light itself?_

But then it hits him, just like it does when she turns suddenly to face him in the park, the setting sun glinting just right through the strands of her hair, or when he runs the tip of his nose down the length of her neck as he pulls her closer to him under the covers and beams of moonlight.

He can't pinpoint when he fell in love. He can't cut out the moment when his heart went from his to hers. He can't do any of that, not when everyday he falls in love a little more.

He loves her. _God_ , he loves her. And every day his mind and heart crave the radiance she lights within them.

He loves her most in the morning, when the sun is streaming past the peak in the curtains and her head is a mess of tangles and curls. It's then, when the day still hasn't set in, that he sees her stripped of everything and anything – then when the walls that she puts up for the rest of the world are battered and shattered and pummeled in the ground.

He always wakes first, and it's a privilege, he thinks, to get to watch her eyelids flicker and her lips pull into a sleepy smile. There's nothing more beautiful than her quiet sighs and warm embrace – nothing more precious than her tired _I love you's._

He loves her most at 7 am, when she leans lazily in the shower, her eyes shut and body languid and flushed from the streaming hot water. She's not a morning person – Tobias sometimes likes to think she's rarely even a person on some days – but by God, she is his person. He still strokes the scar on his left thumb from when she threw the alarm clock at him the first and only time he tried waking her up for a run. She'd had a frown on her face the rest of that day, and it was when only Tobias had poked her side and basked in the sound of her giggle did he understand that she was more upset about hurting him than being woken up at some forsaken hour.

He loves her most when she comes home from work, and all she can do is communicate in huffs and sighs. Tobias is normally the one of fewer words, but the thirty minutes at half past six are the minutes that Tris claims as her own. She's tired, she's hungry, and she knows she should have woken up for that run because now she feels fat, but it's Tobias who is there to slip the heels of her feet and pull her into his arms. It's Tobias whose chest Tris breathes into when they lay sprawled on the couch with nothing but the slight hum of the air conditioner sounding in the background.

He loves her most during dinner, when she sits propped on the kitchen counter top chattering away as he hovers over the stove. She can't cook for shit – they found that out the hard way – but it's the stolen kisses and brushes against knees and _Tris, quit eating that, there won't be anything left_ that builds their nightly tradition.

He loves her most when she pulls him out of a panic attack and chases away the nightmares that have been his anchor since childhood. He can feel her warmth pressed against his body, can feel her fingers combing through his hair. He can hear her small whispers, her breathing, even her heartbeat and it's in those moments that he finds his anchor in her.

He loves her most under covers, he loves her most on Christmas morning and New Year's Day. He loves her most at night when quiet whispers of the future, yearnings of little feet and cherub faces, and promises of years to come leave small smiles graced across their lips. He loves her most in the summer, under falling leaves, with glasses slipping down the bridge of her nose and a pen trapped between her teeth. He loves her most on their wedding day, when _her_ heart became his.

He loves her most when he sees her last.

It's the last day he really loves anything. Christina tells him she's gone and she is, he can see it in her pale face and silent heart, but the minute he touches her cheek it all comes back, all the light, all the warmth, all of the midnight dances in the living room and the giggles in front of the fireplace and the wine spilled on his t-shirt and cold feet pressed against warm calves and the strength of her small arms and kisses on his cheek when he vowed to be hers _always, always, always_. His heart is twisting and breaking and shattering into a million pieces and even though she's the one with the bullet in her chest, he's the one who's left to feel its damage.

And then he knows – he knows when he fell in love. He knows it down to the very moment.

" _What's your name?"_

" _Um.."_

" _Think about it, you don't get to pick again."_

" _Tris."_

Tris _._

" _Welcome to Dauntless."_

 **IDK my dudes, I'm supposed to be writing an application essay yet here I am so fuck me. I really miss writing, I really really do. Probably more that Tobias misses Tris (hahaha :((( just kiddingggg). ANYWAY thanks for sticking with me my homies, will definitely try my best to be more frequent with my updates and to stop writing new things and try to finish the older stuff. I wish I could write for a living and not have to take so many random classes but hey, college is** _ **coolege**_ **am I right? LOVE YOU ALL, PLEASE REVIEW MY LOVELY FRIENDLINGS. :))))**


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